I went into labour very unexpectedly at 35 weeks. I remember finishing work and feeling a lot of pain but thinking it was normal after being on my feet all day. I was very uncomfortable overnight and when I woke up on the Saturday before my son was born I was bleeding and having contractions.
I rushed to the MFAU and had observations and a scan done. Everything looked alright at that point but I was then admitted to the hospital, so they could keep an eye on me.
I had taken a video of the observations being done, so I could show my twin sister, Charlie, who is an Obs and Gynae registrar. I was all alone, as Charlie lives out of London and my parents were away on holiday. The nurses told me not to worry. I had a urine infection and an irritable uterus. That it didn't mean that the baby was coming. I told my sister not to rush down. However, after seeing the observations, Charlie told me she was coming down to London on the train right then.
It was at that point I started to worry. I was very scared – I was completely alone and not at all prepared for the situation that unfolded over the next few days.
My son, Peter Charlie Johnson, was born five weeks early via emergency C-section at 4.44pm on Monday the 22nd of May 2023, at University College London Hospital.
Although the team seemed to have few worries about Peter's health before the C-section, unfortunately when he was born he wasn't breathing and had to be resuscitated. Peter was also unusually big for 35 weeks weighing 7.5lbs. Charlie, on the other hand, was very worried about Peter from the minute she saw the video of my observations. She kept face magnificently in front of me so as not to worry me further but I found out after how worried she was for us both.
I went into that C-section thinking I'd be holding a healthy baby boy after it – albeit a little early but he'd be OK. I hadn't prepared myself at all that anything could go wrong as I was so close to his due date. I didn't end up meeting my son until just before midnight which was nearly seven hours after his birth. I could only hold his hand through the incubator and then I had to leave him.
Peter was born and started on High Flow Oxygen once he had been resuscitated. He then deteriorated and had to be put on a ventilator. He also needed antibiotics for an infection and light therapy for jaundice.
In the NICU, Peter was so well cared for but I really struggled. He was so much bigger than the micro preemies he was sharing a room with and I almost felt like a fraud being there. I found it incredibly difficult to leave him after our visits. But then I also found it difficult sitting by his bedside not being able to hold him and watching him struggle.